maandag 30 mei 2011

How to Stay Positive when You Know Your Life Sucks

1. Ground Yourself.
The most common reason why people think their lives suck is that they aren't living their own lives. Look deeply into whether you are acting to please others - to please family, friends, and society. Realize that you need to get to know who you are and what your needs are, and make the choices to follow your own path. To know these things, a path of meditation and inner exploration is invaluable.

2. Look on the inside.
What are some qualities you have that you like about yourself? Are you funny? Are you intelligent? Are you sincere? Are you generous? What do you have pride in? Try focusing on the positive things in your life. You may be having a positive influence on others even when you think you're useless.
   
3. Prove those negative thoughts wrong.
When you find yourself in a bad mood, you could think of the negative things such as, "I'm dumb and annoying", "I'm better off dead", "I'm ugly, I wish I looked different", etc. Even though it's not true. Change your mind. Look for your good features, think about the ones that you know love you, look on your greater side. Realize that nobody's life is easy and that there will always be ups and downs, and moments of low self esteem. Don't automatically assume that nobody cares. Every person matters to someone. You're alive for a reason.
 
4. Appreciate what you see.
Look in the mirror. Find some beautiful things about yourself.... Do you have nice skin? nice nails? beautiful eyes? full lips? Find stuff that appeals to you. When you can't change something, change your attitude towards it!

5. It's all how you look at it.
Jealous of the people with 'amazing' lives? They chose to be that way! Remember, there are people living in mansions who are miserable and people living on the street who are perfectly happy. It's all on how you look at it.

6. Determine how your life could be better.
What can you do to make your life better? What do you desire to do? How do you want to feel? Make a few reachable goals and your own strategies. The first step is usually the hardest - getting help or admitting you need it.

7. Sometimes it's just luck.
A lot of things in life are just luck. Where you were born, whether you had a kind loving family or an abusive one where your mind or even your life is in danger, whether you belong in your community or were born into an out-group by religion, race, etc., whether your family was rich or poor are all random things. It's what you do with it that matters. Remember that there is something epic and heroic in rising from harsh circumstances to do something well. Just surviving a rough situation and coming out of it with a heart is a triumph, a story that could move people long after you lived. That matters.


Sometimes situations that look good from the outside, like a wealthy but emotionally abusive family can inspire both misery and jealousy from others. Accept that's the situation. Remember that your life is your own and its direction is your choice. You don't have to be who other people tell you that you are, whether that's Future Criminals of America or Ruthless Cut-Throat Capitalist. You can change your life by choosing the direction that matters to you and pursuing it one small step at a time.


1. Get motivated.
What motivates you? What gives you energy to go on everyday? Music? Love? Family? A 1km run? God/Allah? Your attitude? Your pet? Friends? School? Give yourself a boost by focusing on what is important to you personally. 

2. Remember that some things can pass with time.
There will be a tomorrow. There will be a next week. There will be a next month and perhaps by then, things will have changed for the better. If you are underage in a bad situation you have a definite release date after which your life is your own, all the things you could do to better it will come into reach even if they're difficult.

3. Reminisce.
Whenever you feel like the future is 'hopeless', think about happy memories. It will help make you feel better and remind you that in the future, there will be good things, too. Think about all the good things you've experienced, felt, and achieved, and consider how many more good things could be waiting ahead. There will be many great moments in your life - don't let a few obstacles get in the way. If you don't have any happy memories, this is relative - don't judge them by things other people think of as "happy memories." Think of the moments it wasn't as bad, even if those were only in solitude.

4. Don't stop yourself from feeling the joy.
It's okay to step back once in awhile and just enjoy the moment. Even in tough situations - it's important to smile and laugh here and there. Don't restrict yourself from doing things you love because they're "not important" or because you think you'll be criticized for doing them. Let yourself enjoy life even if you're not at the best place you could be. You only live once - make the best of it.

5. Develop a gratitude journal.
It's pretty simple. At the end of every day, write down five things that have made you happy or appreciative that day -- not necessarily big things, even small ones count. For example: nice weather, being praised by my boss for getting an urgent errand done, my playful dog, kids and hubby kissing me goodbye before they went to school/work, a hilarious joke a mate shared, etc.

6. If you feel persistently sad, unmotivated, anxious, hopeless or fearful, seek professional help.
You may be suffering from a mood disorder or nutritional deficit which could be contributing to your situation. Chronic physical pain can cause these symptoms too, if an aspirin lifts your mood then go to a pain clinic. Remember there is always somebody there who wants to help you. You are valuable!

18 opmerkingen:

  1. a lot of good stuff here. i think the most important thing is knowing yourself.
    +followed

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  2. thanks for the tips i'll get 2 it a lil later

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  3. Very inspiring and good post! I have often looked back in times when things havn't been going to well and always remember that somewhere out there someone else has it worse off that you no matter what and that everything happens in this world for a reason. I always pass on those facts to mates that are feeling down and usually helps a little bit.

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  4. Hmm, I like the last advice the best. Time to go make coffee! =P

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  5. I think "6. Determine how your life could be better." is important. By making goals you won't feel like your life is useless.

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  6. Fantastic tips, there are so many people with such a low self-esteem, if more people could read this then perhaps they would be more confidence in the world.

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  7. I think your blog is better than most mmm

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  8. Im too selfish to think that my life sucks... more likely i will realise that world sucks. But maybe that guide will help somebody less... missing right word... than me

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  9. I can't do a gratitude journal, I just feel like, because I loath journaling, I would somehow start to resent the good things because I journal them. :P

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  10. Great tips man, my girlfriend has these kind of thoughts often and i try and help her, gonna save this words up

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  11. Nice post and great blog. I've had some problem with my motivation lately but this made me want to change.

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  12. really good advice. I really like the positivity of it all

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  13. As always great write up. I found that reading a few books helped me realize my life really wasn't that bad.

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  14. My life sucks, im stranded and will kill myself very soon. Fuck you.

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